Lemon Meringue FAIL

Happy New Years!  I’ve missed you!  I have taken a break from blogging, but am determined to be back full force in 2012.  It’s not that I haven’t had anything to share with you…quite the opposite.  I’ve been very busy in the kitchen the past few months, I just haven’t been sure of what to write about.  I am a very organized person (some *cough*, Jacob, might say OCD), and I’ve been having a hard time organizing this blog into something that suits me.  I considered for a while focusing on baking, but then I found myself doing mostly cooking, at which point I decided it didn’t matter, and I should just write about whatever I wanted, then I went away on vacation and didn’t write anything at all…anyway, it’s been a little up in the air around here. But enough of that.  I am done trying to categorize, organize, and label everything (well maybe not everything, but the blog at least), and I am just going to share with you whatever it is I happen to be doing whenever I feel like doing it. So there. 

And once I made my resolution, like everyone else after New Years I ran out to fullfill it immediately.  Which is how I come to the story of my Lemon Meringue Pie Failure.  You see, in my little corner of middle-of-nowhere we never get Meyer lemons in the grocery store.  So when my Walmart, of all places, got them in I, of course, bought a bag immediately to whip up into something wonderful.  Also, not two weeks before this I had made something  that required me to use 8 egg yolks (don’t ask what, because for the life of me I can’t remember.  Strange, since anything that uses 8 egg yolks should be pretty memorable.), and since I can’t bear to waste anything, I froze those 8 egg whites for future use.  So here I am with a bag full of Meyer lemons and an abundance of egg whites – what else was there to do but make lemon meringue pie? I went to the Bon Appetit Dessert book, which to this date has never failed me, and found the Classic Lemon Meringue pie.  I followed the recipe to the letter (I say that, but it wouldn’t be a failure, would it, if I had done everything right, so I’ve really no idea what happened) and still my lemon curd never thickend up.  You cook lemon juice, sugar, egg yolks, a little cornstarch, and lemon zest over medium heat “until it thickens and boils, about 10 minutes”.  I must have whisked that crap around for close to 20, but no thickening occurred.  By that point I was pretty fed up with the whole thing, so I figured, with misplaced optimism, that if I poured it in the pie crust and let it cool while I made the meringue, it might firm up.  Um no.  It did not.  I did make the meringue.  I even spread it around beautifully atop that murky yellow slush that was supposed to be the yummy essence of Meyer lemons.  I even put it in the oven and baked it up into a lovely looking, golden meringue-crowned, beauty of a pie.  Nope.  Once you cut into it, it was an oozing, soggy-crusted, sorry-looking pie, with a beautiful (and quite tasty) meringue top.  And that, my friends, is how we celebrate New Years day around here.